SLEEPING

TUESDAY AFTER PALM SUNDAY IN LENT 2015

It is Holy Tuesday and today I want to look at Mark 14:32—42. There are two thoughts on my mind today. The first; how hard it is for me to be present with Jesus when I am tired. The second; Gethsemane.

Last night the Cathedral hosted a Service of Chrism and the Renewal of Ordination Vows. It was a lovely service. Some 70 or more clergy were present, including two bishops, and another 75 or so people in the congregation. The priests all con-celebrated with Bishop Love. At the end of the service he blessed the Holy Oils that are used throughout parts of the diocese for the coming year. After it we then had dinner…dinner for 120. It was a lovely dinner.  Our governing board, the Chapter, served as the wait staff and then did the cleanup. To pull that all off my day started early. The service has lots of details. As people arrive there are lots of instructions to give. I find that some folks get keyed up for a big unusual service and it requires I try and stay calmer…all of this takes energy. And then of course there are the things that do not go properly during the service and there is not a blessed thing you can do about it. Last night it was my failure to set out hymnals on the special seats for the clergy, and so there we are, at the first hymn, with 70 or so clergy scurrying about to find and pass along hymnals…that also takes a bit of energy out of me.

So here are the disciples…they just have eaten the Passover meal. It is late and they find themselves out in the garden. “Can’t you even stay awake with me for one hour” Jesus asks? I am feeling the tiredness in me and I must admit, I would have been one of those asleep…and unlike the disciples…I know what lays ahead and how it ends…certainly with this knowledge I should be able to stay awake…but if I am honest with myself, I know I cannot. When I am tired I have trouble staying with Jesus.

Which brings me to my second point: Gethsemane. Most of you reading this blog know that this word refers to the stone, the very large heavy stone that was rolled over the olives to squeeze every last drop of oil out of them…a terribly fitting metaphor for Jesus’ agony in the Garden. In some ways this scene reveals how small my view of God can be. This scene reveals that expanse of God’s love. Jesus’ hesitation (if that is what we might call it) can be seen as his humanness struggling not against his Father’s will, but rather death. Which of us goes to the grave willingly…we are wired for life…and so there, under the weight of my sin, Jesus pauses, revealing the inherent human desire for life…and then he quickly continues into the path of his Passion for exactly that compelling reason—that we might have life and have it more abundantly.

Thank God this all, none of it, relies on me…there are just too many days when I would fall asleep.